The balancing act of a working mom – it’s not an easy feat. I recently talked to a couple of young mothers struggling with the juggling of it all and it brought back memories of my own past insecurities about the decision to have a job outside of the home.

 

For many families, it takes two incomes to keep it all going. Like many young brides, I was employed when I walked down the aisle. First came love, then came marriage, then came a mortgage, insurance, a car payment and a variety of other financial obligations. As the kiddos came along, life sure didn’t get any less expensive so the luxury of being a stay-at-home mom was never really an option.

 

For several years, I reduced my hours and worked part-time. When our three oldest kids were little, they knew that if I was at work one day, I’d be home with them the next. Still, I felt guilty on work days. And I even liked my job – and the good friends I had made there. I made up for lost time with my babies by letting them stay up late. Some people thought I was crazy, but I liked the extra evening time with them. It worked for us. Of course, when they got to be of school age, we had to switch up the plan.

 

When number four baby came along many years later, I had already gone back to full-time employment. That made the balancing act even trickier. By then, I had learned to place less importance on household chores and more importance on what truly counted. Cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping took a back seat. Hoops in the driveway took precedence over dusting. Pitching a bucket of balls was priority over washing supper dishes. People had told me years before that that stuff could wait. They were right.

 

I was very fortunate to have an employer who understood my situation. Every once in a while, my little boy would accompany me to the office; quietly playing Matchbox cars under my desk. There were never any questions asked. I can now look back on that and smile.

 

I truly understand the guilt associated with being a working mom. I vividly remember little faces against the window when I backed my car out of the driveway. I recall – to this day with dread – the tears and the pleading not to leave. I remember explaining that I “had” to work and after the conversation ended, I remember thinking they didn’t buy it. Heck, I hardly bought it myself.

 

Sometimes you got to do what you got to do. You might have to work. You might figure out a way not to. But one thing I know for sure is that you love your kids with all your heart and that you will find your own tricks for spending true, quality undivided time with them. Your kids will see how important it is to you and they’ll remember it always. In truth, I believe the main component to the balancing act isn’t whether or not you have a job, it’s having the desire and will to carve out that chunk of time your kids need and deserve. If you make it a priority, it will happen. It’s that simple. 

 

Julie Perine can be reached at 304-848-7200, julie@connect-bridgeport.com or follow @JuliePerine on Twitter!

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