The first time I was aware of autism was back in the late-1980s when “Rain Man” hit the big screen. I was pretty intrigued with Dustin Hoffman’s character. Raymond was mentally impaired and socially awkward; so much that he was dysfunctional, yet he could remember everything – even movies in their entirety – line by line by line. How could that be? How could a mind work like that?

 

It was about a decade later when I first knew someone who was autistic, the baby of some friends. He was a toddler when his parents suspected there was a problem. Once diagnosed on the autistic spectrum, those young parents took it upon themselves to read, learn, travel and attend conferences – do absolutely everything in their power to become educated about the disorder and to work with their little boy, giving him every advantage and opportunity to become involved, learn to his potential and interact socially. I was so impressed with their dedication. One of the breakthroughs discovered was the importance of a gluten-free diet. The couple became dedicated to the plan 100 percent and progress made indicated that it definitely made a difference. That’s just one of the many things they implemented into their young son’s life. He has grown to be a handsome, friendly, witty young man.

 

Not many years later, I became acquainted with Alan Dye of WDTV when we did some work projects together. Around the same time, my son Jeffrey went to school with Alan’s son Nathan. Nathan is also autistic. But even before I knew that, I learned that Alan was raising this little boy as a single parent. He just lit up at the mention of his son. Summer after summer, I saw them together at Bridgeport Pool. When I would speak to Nathan, rather than answering me, he repeated exactly what I said. Yet, Alan continued to encourage his son to interact with and acknowledge others. I remember wondering if he would get it. He did. Alan delved so deeply in Nathan’s development; never ever giving up on him and spending important time together doing things that dads and boys do. After participating on the Bridgeport High School Track Team and completing all of his academic requirements, Nathan graduated from BHS in 2007 and thereafter went on to pursue an independent life at an autism-specific assisted living facility in Huntington, near Marshall University. Alan told me at that time that letting Nathan go was the hardest thing he had ever done in his life. But it is what he had prepared his son for all along.

 

Just a couple years ago, I had the privilege of meeting Conner Ford. I knew about Conner and I knew he was autistic. But as I came face to face with him across the table, I was pretty amazed at the school work he was doing. His mom Carol was his teacher. She had actually left her job to be Conner’s fulltime teacher. There you go again, pure love in action. Like all the other parents mentioned above, Carol and her husband Brad became very involved in learning about autism and advocating for the disorder. Heading up the Corridor Chapter of the Autism Society of West Virginia, they organized all kinds of activities for children on the autism spectrum. Included was the swimming challenge at the YMCA. The Autism Society not only facilitated activities during which children with autism could connect, but also provided a way for parents and siblings to get to know others facing the same daily challenges. On the day I visited the Ford home, Conner and I kind of clicked. He took me around the house and showed me his amazing artwork. He also got a huge kick out of jumping out and scaring me - sporting a dragon costume. I loved his sense of humor and I loved how he was so incredibly real with his feelings and his passions.

 

Thirty years ago or so, I was pretty impressed with the work of an actor in a movie role. After meeting these– and other amazing individuals dealing with the same disorder – I feel like I have been fortunate to learn some important life lessons from some real all-star families.

 

The puzzle piece has become the symbol for autism. Through the years, I have seen moms and dads, grandmas and grandpas, teachers and other professionals, organizers and other selfless individuals work together to piece together a puzzle. How can it be? How can a mind work like that?

 

Through hard work, lots of reading, networking and sharing, trial and error, laughter and tears, hugs and hurt feelings, frustration and true pure unconditional love, the puzzle is slowly assembled as people do unite - and understand a little more about this most amazing disorder

 

This blog is dedicated to the memory of Amie Fiorito Darway of the BHS class of 1992. Amie recently passed away very unexpectedly, leaving behind three young children, including a set of twin boys, one who is autistic. All who knew Amie will agree: She was a very vibrant personality, always looking at the positive. Like the other awesome parents mentioned in this blog, she was very much immersed in her son's wellbeing and grasped every opportunity to help him progress and live life to the fullest. It was Amie's prayer that there would someday be a breakthrough in autism research. It was even requested during her funeral and visitation that in lieu of flowers, gifts be made to the Corridor Chapter of the Autism Society of West Virginia. April is Autism Awareness Month. If you would like to donate to this most important cause, checks in Amie's memory can be sent to the chapter at P.O. Box 8182, Nutter Fort, WV 26301. Contributions can be made to the national organization, where you can learn much more about autism  HERE. 

 

Julie Perine can be reached at 304-848-7200, julie@connect-bridgeport.com or follow @JuliePerine on Twitter.