Level Up: Goat Simulator
By Samual Cale on May 07, 2015 from Level Up
Have you ever wanted to be a goat? No?
Well, now that the question has been raised, I’d conjecture you’re curious. Well, now you can finally find out what it’s like to be a goat in the entirely unrealistic, and completely hilarious Goat Simulator.
Goat Simulator is essentially just a physics engine, but it’s strangely addictive. You get to be a titular horned animal, with an objective to
score points by doing tricks and destroying things. Your goat-bilities include running very fast, a head-butt, a long tongue you can use to throw things, an indestructible body, and the chance to perform physics defying tricks like a 360 degree rotation followed by a triple front-flip.
score points by doing tricks and destroying things. Your goat-bilities include running very fast, a head-butt, a long tongue you can use to throw things, an indestructible body, and the chance to perform physics defying tricks like a 360 degree rotation followed by a triple front-flip.
Each of the varied maps contain 30 hidden goat statues and finding them gives your animal funny new skins, like a giraffe or a penguin. There is also a large variety of hidden thing on each map that gives you special powers, called mutations. One of the more fun times you can have is finding a jetpack, which gives you the jetpack mutation and allows uncontrollable flight. All mutations are activated with a single button, so if you turn on all your mutations and press the “special button,” you’ll be in for quite a ride.
Your goat is not entirely alone in Goat Simulator. Although it has no online play, you can have up to a total of four players on the same console. There are also a few non-player goats standing around, and a dozen or so different models of human non-player characters who will talk, freak out, and run away if you choose to attack them. If you are feeling a bit blood thirsty, humans can be killed, but their demise is often buggy. If you knock a dancing human to the ground, he may just lay there and keep on trying to dance.
Speaking of bugs (a repeating error in the program), the developers of Goat Simulator left all the bugs in the game that don’t cause a crash. Their reasoning “if it doesn’t make the game crash, its hilarious.” And you know what? They are right.
In conclusion, I give Goat Simulator a 5/10. It is hilarious and fun to mess around in, but it has no storyline whatsoever. Basically, I’d only recommend playing it if you’re bored and have no better way to spend your time. On the upside, its only $10, so I consider my money well spent on some laughs.
Goat Simulator is rated T for teen for violence.
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